I’m still trying to figure out what to do with my life now that I’m a mom. Feeling the some weird pressures and tensions that are obviously new to me. On one hand I am expected (by no one in particular) to work, to have a career, to make something of myself. On the other I am expected to be at home with my kids, to love being a mom and therefore make that “enough” for me. There are these expectations from others, from society, and from myself. I’m having a huge struggle sorting all of this out. I guess it’s what women do. And some men. But I have rarely met a man who has had to be the one to give up a career or the hope of a career in order to be at home with kids. Don’t get me wrong. This is not something I expect my husband to do. But I struggle because it is me who is the one who has to make this decision. And it is me who will be judged either way.
So how do I do both. How do I find a balance of home and work. This is apparently trickier that one would think when you need to find a) part time daycare (almost impossible) and b) a part time job that pays enough to justify the daycare. There is rarely a good balance in life. Either you’re always working, or you’re always at home. Too much of one thing, not enough of another, and too much of another and not enough of the one thing.
Siiiiiiiiiiiiigh.
So what’s the good news today? The sun is shining. And my parents got possession of their house!!!! Back to some sense of normal how life is going to be now!
P.S. if you know of a fantastic east side daycare that is accepting part time (2 kids 14 months old), let me know. Immediately.
